These bad boys measure 45 inches from toe to top. They won’t be that long once they go ’round yer legs, but there’ll still be more than enough sock to stuff into your boots for some serious ass kickin’. Filled with quarters, these also double as a weapon of self defense. Not that you need anything other than your fists, of course. Fiber Content: 80% cotton with 20% spandex. They all also contain elastic in the ribbing to keep them up. Sock Dreams Label. Made in the United States.
Style Tips from Mr. Utilikilts: Generally, it’s excellent to match the color of your socks to the color of your kilt. Conversely, socks can match belts and shoes and contrast the color of the kilt. Earth tones– olive, tan, brown, and grey–generally go well with other earth tones. Black goes with everything. Black kilt, black socks, red belt and shoes. Know what I’m sayin’? Olive kilt, black belt, black shoes, and olive or black socks. See the trend here? And remember, match your shoes and your belt and you’re mostly home.
TLDR: ORDER THE SAME SIZE AS YOUR PANTS.
If you’re a 34 in Levis, you’re a 34 in Utilikilts. Done.
If you haven’t put on a pair pants since 2004 and have been living under a rock since 2015, first of all: Welcome back!
We did away with the “Honest Inch” System awhile ago. Cool as it was, 95% of all returns were due to sizing issues. After the advent of the Switchback, our adjustability feature–made with Military Grade 2″ Velcro combined with a flexible shock cord ‘asset’ (like a corset for your ass)–Utilikilts are now sized within a range of inches, up to 15% of the waistband measurement so now you can wear it out before you grow out of it.
Still not clear? Wrap a tape around your beltline where you plan to wear your kilt. No, not a metal tape measure, Silly. A seamstress tape. What’s it say? Put that number in the middle of one of the size ranges below. The number on your pants does not accurately reflect the measurement in INCHES around your beltline. And now you know.
Switchback Size Chart
|Sizes 2X & 3X||TBA||TBA|
What about the length of my Utilikilt*?
We make three standard lengths.
TLDR: Taller than 6’4″? you’re a 24.5… Shorter than 5’10”? You’re a 21.5…Everyone else? 23″. Done.
|65″ up to 70″||21.5″|
|70″ up to 74″||23″|
|74″ up to 78″||24.5″|
If you are all torso walking on a pair of stumpy legs or the inverse of that, following our handy sizing instructions will get you right where you want to be. The best way to find your fit is by kneeling and measuring your side, from the top of your pants to the floor (like this). Don’t bend your torso while measuring, it skews the reading. You’ll need something stiff (a yardstick, you pervert!), a mirror, or the help of a friend. The waistband should sit on your hips where your pants normally ride. The hem should rest between the bottom and center of the kneecap.